A New Beginning

06/09/14 

Today marks the end of my time at CMCT! Time has flown. I must thankyou all for your prayer and support it has really made my time so much easier!! All the calls and messages and letters have been such a blessing to me. God has done so many amazing things! He is truly blessed this ministry at CMCT. It has been such a pleasure to be able to assist them. I have also learnt so much and will continue to reflect on my experience for a long time. I am bringing home many tasks to continue support from Australia.

I have been trying to think about my time here at CMCT, of an easy way to summarize and put into words my experiences here over the past 3 months. I have tried to think of ways to describe or explain. I cannot. I look over photographs I have taken that only offer a glimmer of the truth. I have looked over my journal that only scrapes the surface. There is no way to accurately portray any of it.

I came in the hope to serve. And at that I have done my best. God has used me in ways I would never have anticipated. He has asked me to do things that I have never done before or that I have previously lacked the confidence to attempt. In fact God has basically chosen all my weaknesses and worked through them. Squeezing good out of them.

I have had so many wonderful opportunities to serve. I have worked in the physiotherapy clinic with the lovely physiotherapist, Portia. I have provided physiotherapy services at a number of medical camps. I have been able to educate many of the medical staff according to Western Physiotherapy training. I have been able to run sessions of worship and provide talks to adults and children at many different ministries. I have been able to sit with people to counsel and pray with them or to just be a friend and a shoulder to lean on. I have been able to visit homes of the afflicted. Recently, I have started setting up a new library for CMCT. The list goes on, as the scope of ministry at CMCT seems to extend forever!

I tell you these things only so you can understand what serving at CMCT might look like. But in everything God is at work. He is the one working and the staff at CMCT are merely faithful vessels for his glory. Not one day has gone past during my stay here that God has not taught me something. Not one day has gone past that He has not challenged me. In reflecting and writing this I almost feel selfish. I feel as though I have gained so much from my time here that there is no way I could ever even start to give back a just amount.

Every time I ventured out to a ministry, I was overwhelmed. The need is so great in every ministry area. The staff of CMCT are working so hard to meet the needs of the people in Chennai physically, socially and spiritually. The soil is so fertile here!! There is great response to the gospel message in many of the ministries. God’s love is being shared with people and as a result souls are being saved!

CMCT itself has been wonderful. Dr Colleen Redit has been truly welcoming and so kind. What a wonderful and faithful woman of God. She is such a wonderful role model is certainly a great influence in my life. The staff of CMCT have worked so hard to keep me comfortable and safe during my stay. There is no way I can thank them enough! They have been so amazing and I am so grateful for everything each one of them has done for me. Many have cooked for me and guided me and talked to me and invited me into their homes. The work God is achieving through CMCT is truly amazing.

Tomorrow, I leave Chennai and head up to the mountain areas in Kerala and Ooty. I will be joining Pastor Ezra and my friend Mariam will accompany us. We will be visiting a number of church plants throughout the village areas to run programs for the women and children. I am not sure when I will next have wifi but I will certainly fill you in as soon as possible!!

Please be praying for us. The rains have been very heavy so the roads are dreadful. Pray for our safe travels. Also for our health as we venture through the villages. Many of the men in these areas are aggressive alcoholics and are very abusive to the women and children. Pray for our safety as we seek to reach out to those suffering. Pray that the hearts of these people will be soft and ready to hear the gospel! Pray that God will use us well for his glory and that souls will be saved.

Watch this space!!!

With Love,

Jo

Just Some Inspiring Stories

04/09/2014

It has been a while since I posted. Last weekend I was fighting off a severe fever. I have now recovered. I have continued gathering information and case histories for the CMCT website. I have also been organising their new library for them and continuing with my work in the physiotherapy clinic.

I have spoken to hundreds of people. I have heard many stories and truly been touched by everyone. Though they have all affected me personally, and I hope I never forget them, there are 2 people in particular that niggle my memory. Their faces seem to be burnt into my mind. Their emotions and expressions and lives imprinted in a way I can’t and won’t shake them.

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The first lady I met at the Leprosy colony in Alapakkam. I was walking around meeting with people, gathering case histories and praying. I saw this lady sitting in her home on the floor by the door. Her feet were severely deformed due to the leprosy. Her whole body was suffering. Just gazing upon her you could feel physical pain. You could see the years of affliction that bore down on her shoulders. Her name was Mercykanthy. She was 82 years old.

I am ashamed by this but I will tell you the truth. When I first saw her, my mind immediately thought, “well, she will be an interesting story”. I was pleased when she agreed to talk to me. It was not long before I felt like slapping myself across the face. I felt so guilty for thinking in this way. Her life is not a mere publicity story. I have been taking so many histories that sometimes I have to kick myself in the butt and remind myself to keep connecting, to keep genuinely caring and focusing on portraying these lives well. To courageously embrace their life stories in order to get the reality of suffering in poverty ‘out there’. Her suffering and deep torture is very real, so real that the years have completely destroyed her. I was talking to a shell. The inside was stone.

She shuffled out of the little home on her bottom. It was too difficult to stand. Her feet and hands were rounded nobs where her toes and fingers should have been. Her skin was dry and she had pressure wounds that were bandaged. The physical impairment was severe, but the inner turmoil was far worse. Her eyes showed grief and sadness. Her face showed a longing for company and love. 

Mercykanthi was diagnosed with leprosy 40 years ago. She was married with 3 very young children at the time. They all abandoned her. They left her to fend for herself. That is when she moved to the leprosy colony in Alapakkam. Mercykanthy was forced to travel a long way into Chennai daily to beg. Nobody would give money due to the stigma associated with leprosy. Nobody wanted to encourage more lepers to come so they would not give anything. She travelled daily to beg and received petty amounts, barely enough to by a bun to eat.

Today, her daughter will sneak a visit a few times a year. She will only stay for a very shot time and she will not come near to her mother. The contact with her daughter is nice, but there is still so much distance. Such rejection and judgement.

When asked what life has been like since that time, Mercykanthy describes the most difficult life. A life that would be filled with utter sadness, loneliness and grief. But she is unable to express these emotions to me. Though her eyes are infinite wells of grief, she merely tells me that she is sad. Sad. That is all she can say. After facing 40 years of physical pain and suffering, complete isolation and rejection, all she can say is that she is sad.

Again, please do not judge me for saying this, but for a moment I was disappointed. How am I supposed to write an interesting story when this is all she can say? (Someone please slap me!) I kept thinking about this. Dumbfounded. After all she had just told me, her only descriptor was ‘sad’. How could this be? When I look at her I see so much more. When I speak with her I hear so much more. When I read her I feel an intensity that I cannot describe. So how can this be? 

Though her eyes show me a depth of emotion and her body represents years of pain, I think she has lost the ability to feel. Over time her heart has hardened, she has gradually desensitised for protection and self-preservation. She looks defeated. She is sad. Her insides have hardened. She has becomes a shell. A shell that desperately needs to be filled again, to be nurtured and loved. A shell that is unknowingly hungry for Jesus in her life. She is not just an interesting story. She is a shell will a soul that God is longing after and a heart that God is waiting to fill again.

The face of Mercykanthy has been vivdly on my mind for the past few weeks:

 

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The second lady I met at the Chetpet soup kitchen. She arrived very early while we were still preparing the food. She stayed very late. Just quietly, she sat on the floor in the corner. I started speaking with her and then asked if I could record her story. She was really the walking example of faith. She is the definition of ‘filled to the brim’. I’d love to share her story with you; I hope you find it as challenging and inspiring as I have.

Maragatham is 77 years old. She lives on the roadside outside a small chemist in Chetpet, Chennai. She has no shelter, no income, no food, no family and has only the clothes on her back. Maragatham has nearly died 6 times now from severe asthma attacks. She is the most thankful lady I have ever met. But what is she thankful for you might say? She literally has nothing. You are wrong. Maragatham has everything she needs. She is genuinely happy and satisfied in her life.

“I am so thankful for CMCT. God has provided me with this place and this daily meal and worship. CMCT gives me my asthma medication too. I am so thankful for the place that I sleep. It is a good spot. It is outside a chemist who sometimes gives me some shelter from the rain. Sometimes somebody will walk past and give me money – enough to buy a hot cup of tea. When this happens I can only thank God. God has provided everything for me. I am so happy and I truly thank God for everything I have.”

Maragatham attends the CMCT church (Bridge Gospel Church). She receives a daily meal at the soup kitchen and free medical care. In the photo below she wears a saree given to her for Christmas by CMCT. She is very unwell and asks that you pray for her health. Also please pray that God will continue to provide somewhere for her to sleep at night so that her body gets good rest.

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Compassion

Compassion is a key aspect of spirituality. It is a core foundation of the Bible. It is a primary characteristic of God. It is a characteristic that is required of us. “Compassion: A feeling of deep sympathy or sorrow for another who is stricken with misfortune, accompanied by the strong desire to alleviate the suffering”

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Bhuvanesh’s teacher notice her absence from school and took the responsibility to search for her. She was devastated by what she found. She was sickened. She was so moved that she took Bhuvanesh under her care. She approached CMCT for help and rescued this poor girl.

Bhuvanesh was taken away from her alcoholic father to live with her mother. Her mother then married another man illegally. Both of them started drinking. Both became alcoholics. At the age of 11, they prevented Bhuvanesh from attending school. Instead, they forced her to work as a child maid servant to support them all financially.

As the alcohol abuse worsened, this man started to physically abuse Bhuvanesh. He was beat her and sexually abused her. Her mother didn’t care. Bhuvanesh worked hard during the day and returned home in fear of what her new dad might do to her each day. She was terrified and traumatised daily. She was hurt physically. She was destroyed emotionally. At just 11, Bhuvanesh had experienced more horror than most would see in a lifetime.

It was in this stage that Bhuvanesh’s school teacher found her and rescued her. She was 12 at the time. Bhuvanesh was brought to CMCT where she was taken in to live in the hostel. At first, Bhuvanesh was very quiet. She was very nervous and insecure. She wouldn’t make any friends and she didn’t trust anybody.

Bhuvanesh was nurtured in the hostel. She was counselled and comforted. She was sponsored, clothed, fed, loved and sent to school. Slowly over time, changes were noticed. Bhuvanesh started to put on some weight. She was growing well and looking so healthy. She started to make friends and became happy.

Now, Bhuvanesh is doing so well at school, she has won sports medals and loves to play chess. She has accepted Jesus as her personal saviour and loves to read the bible. Bhuvanesh is now a happy and confident 14-year-old girl. She still struggles at times with bad memories but she is so thankful to God for bringing her to CMCT. She loves to spend time with the little children in the hostel. She loves to care for them because she remembers what a blessing that love and support has been in her life.
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Over the past few weeks I’ve been interviewing person after person. I have heard story after story. Each story unique. Each story a reality affecting a human being loved by God. Each one equally as devastating as poor Bhuvanesh. As time has gone on I have started to fear. I have started to probe at my own heart to check that it is still soft. I have become so fearful that it will be toughened by repetition of such stories. By the weight of their problems and the pain of their emotion.

I am overwhelmed by the number of women here that live in fear of their husbands. Alcoholism is a massive problem here and leads to so many problems. Drinking runs a family further and further into the depths of poverty. It consumes the money and time of the drinker, leaving the children to be cared for by a single parent (sometimes by no parent). It also leads to anger, aggression and abuse. The number of women I have spoken to that fear a beating every night is shocking. It’s sickening. The number of children I have spoken to who live in fear of their daddy, who cry as they watch their mum’s being beaten, who scream as their daddy approaches them in rage.

I hear these stories over and over and they become familiar. I hate that they become familiar. I don’t want any of these stories to be lessened. I don’t want the impact of their devastation to be overlooked. I don’t want their pain and suffering to be brushed off or lumped in with a bunch of others. I want my heart to remain soft. I want to hear each individual and love each individual. I want the reality of their situation to resonate deeply in me to produce compassion. I never want to lose that. 

In the bible we see Jesus have compassion. Over and over again, Jesus sees the people and he has compassion.

 

“When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them and healed their sick” (Matt 14:14)

“When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and  he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. And he began to teach them many things” (Mark 6:34)

 

His compassion meant feeling for them but that wasn’t all. He felt their pain deeply but he moved to alleviate their pain as well. True compassion requires action. True compassion requires a soft heart and a strong will.

It is easy to speak of the importance of compassion, but to show true compassion is a difficult challenge. When faced with problem after problem, when faced with the sadness and devastation and grief of others repetitively, it is a challenge to maintain a soft heart. It becomes a heavy task for us and difficult to hear these things. It becomes painful to hear so we numb ourselves. We listen on the outside but we close off our hearts for self-protection. 

Sometimes we don’t notice we do it. Sometime we choose to do it. Think of that friend you have. The one with the depression or the one with ongoing family difficulty or the one that constantly has relationship problems. Do you tire of hearing them speak? Do you genuinely hear them and FEEL for them? Or, over time, have you become numb to their voice. Have you closed your heart to their pain and struggling because it has become monotonous to you, or too difficult or too heavy or has your friend become too ‘needy’. Have you become a fake friend? Jesus looked on them and had compassion.

Even when we succeed at that softness of heart, even when we LISTEN to them and FEEL their pain, do we have the strength to act? To we have the strength of will and the genuinity within us to move. Do we put ourselves aside and alleviate the issue. Or do we just sit there and FEEL. Do we feel good about ourselves because we listened for a few minutes and felt bad for the person? Or are we so moved with compassion that we reach out. Do we actively love that person or do we just say we love them and then sigh relief when the task of speaking is over? Jesus looked on them, he was moved with compassion and then he acted appropriately to alleviate.

 

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” (2 Cor 1:3-4)

“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and,  if one has a complaint against another,  forgiving each other;  as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.” (Col 3:12-13)

 

“Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love,  a tender heart, and  a humble mind.” (1 Peter 3:8)

Compassion is a key aspect of spirituality. It is a core foundation of the Bible. It is a primary characteristic of God. It is a characteristic that is required of us. “Compassion: A feeling of deep sympathy or sorrow for another who is stricken with misfortune, accompanied by the strong desire to alleviate the suffering”

 

 

His Strength is made Perfect in Weakness

20/08/2014

Last night I found myself writing again. I suddenly became conscious of what I was doing and how ridiculous it seemed. I stopped and laughed. Yes, I laughed like a lunatic, sitting alone in my little flat with one light on and a peppermint tea in hand. My hair was so crazed after my shower, I think all I needed was a little more dirt on my skin and 10 cats around me and I would have admitted myself. 

I was writing again. In that moment I remembered that I do no write. Ever. Never before now have I written apart from schooling requirements. Never have I been good at writing, or gramma or spelling or expression. Never has anyone said to me “Gee Jo, you write well”. In this moment I really reflected. I looked back at my time here (which is quickly running out!) and looked at the work God has ask of me. 

To me it seems that God has chosen to use me in my weakness. He seems to have picked out every weakness he can poke a stick at and drag it out for all to see. In my weaknesses he has called on me but somehow through these weaknesses he has produced a little bit of Gold for himself. Just a little more glory. Everything that makes me nervous or uncomfortable, everything I lack confidence in, everything I’m down right useless at. In this I know all too well that I am merely a vessel for his use. In this I know that efforts in my own strength are useless to Him. 

He has asked me to speak. IN FRONT OF PEOPLE. For many people this is no big deal. For me this is basically the end of the world. I usually lose sleep for weeks in advance. I prepare and practice over and over until my voice begs me to stop… and then Ill practice over and over in my mind instead. I get that sick nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach and I battle to keep my voice steady as I speak. This has always been a fear of mine. I have generally avoided it at all costs throughout my years and yet God asked me to speak. He has asked me to speak so frequently here, both short talks and longer messages. At these times I have stood up, taken out my notes and spoken clearly and confidently without any wavering in my voice and without any doubt in my mind. My stomach has felt quite at ease!

Not only has he asked me to speak but he’s asked me to speak with little preparation. I love to be organised (apart from my bedroom, sorry mum and dad!). If my work is not in order, if I have not prepared well, if my diary doesn’t have a clear to do list written, if I have not memorized every point before an exam or practiced a speech at least a million times beforehand then all hell breaks loose. I freak out. There is full blown panic, blind chaos and again, the world is ending. I know it sounds stupid and obviously it is something I have learnt to suppress over time but its true. Yet here, when put on the spot, the right topics or thoughts and the right verses have all popped into my mind. I have calmly written them down and proceeded to speak. In fact sometimes it has been so easy and so calm that I have been left sitting there afterwards frozen in complete silence, so shocked and wondering if it was all a dream.

He has asked me to sing. SOLO. Many, many times. IN FRONT OF PEOPLE. By myself. The first time they asked me to do this I had to confirm all these things repeatedly just in case I was misunderstanding. Unfortunately I was not. Again, this is something I have generally avoided since I was about 12 years old and experienced stage fright. People staring, voice quivering, mind blank terrifying stage fright. With any solo performance until now, musical or sporting, I have always struggled with this. Nerves have overtaken me to the point that I’d rather avoid the activity all together. Not now. Here, no matter where I am people have asked me to sing. Sing sing sing. Solo. Surprisingly it has become easy. It has been quite comfortable. 

He has asked me to write and report. I have been writing articles for the next CMCT Showers magazine and now for the next few weeks I will be writing to help update the CMCT website. It is now, in my most recent task that I have really reflected on this. With no disrespect to God, I find humour in the way that He works. I have been talking to Dr Colleen in recent days and she expressed a massive need that CMCT has had for quite sometime for a writer and reporter. She was saying that I have been an answer to prayer. I cut her off and tried to explain to her that I am not a writer. That I never attempt writing because I know it is a weakness of mine. My grammar is terrible and my vocabulary is poor. Colleen proceeded to cut me off and insist that I had a gift. It was in that moment that I replied “Colleen, I think God gave me this ability only now. Right here, right now. For you. So I could serve Him here at CMCT. I think God has been writing through me to as an answer to your prayer.”

Throughout my life I have been very content with my strengths. There are many things I know I am skilled at and I find comfort and confidence in these things. I don’t mean to sound arrogant, I’m sure everyone knows the things they are better at and the things they are not so good at. I know previously in my life I have even fallen into the trap of finding identity in those things, which is a very dangerous thing. But to me it seems logical that those strengths would be useful to God. That it would be easier for God to use me in areas that my strengths would shine. But that’s not the case. I expected to be asked to use those strengths in ministry or to serve in various ways. But I am not. God doesn’t need me. My ‘strengths’ are nothing in comparison to Him. I am not saying we cannot use our gifts to glorify God because obviously that is what we are called to do. God gives us gifts specifically for that purpose. However, those things we do in our own strength are like filthy rags. Especially when we claim those strengths or gifts as our own. 

It’s the only explanation I can come up with. It’s the only way I can explain the sudden changes; my confidence in speaking, my swift preparation of talks, my fearlessness in singing and helpfulness in writing. These are only a few of the weaknesses God has chosen to use whilst I’ve been here in Chennai. Believe me there are many, many more.

“Strengthen the weak hands,
and make firm the feeble knees.” Isaiah 53:3

 

God has reminded me that skill is nothing when we hold a piece of it for our own glory. I know that’s easy to say and we all know its true in our minds but when we really examine our hearts are we letting go of ourselves? Are we really letting go? Are we willing to give ALL glory to God in our strengths and our actions and our all. Are we willing to let go of that little spark of pride, that little voice inside that tells us we are of worth because of this or that. Or are we still clinging to that sense of success or popularity or pride because of that skill that we have. Are we still looking at all the good things we do and finding our identity in that? Your gift is useless to God while ever you cling onto it because you are stealing the glory that is meant for Him. Let it go and God will use you.

Jesus said “blessed are the poor in spirit”. Blessed are those that recognise they are nothing. Blessed are those that recognise their strengths and their statuses don’t matter. Blessed are those that humble themselves and recognise how poor they really are, those that recognise their own strength is useless, their own efforts are weak, those that realise they have no strength of will, no nobility, no worthiness. Blessed are those who know they are undeserving. It is through this poverty that we enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

God has shown me that when he works through our weaknesses all the glory goes to Him. I cannot take anything away from Him. And I hope I never do. This brought to memory the saying ‘God doesn’t call the qualified, he qualifies the called.’ This is so true. When we dedicate ourselves to God, when we completely offer our WHOLE self, he can literally use us for anything. Our human faults and flaws and weaknesses will only prove Gods power and glory more. We must not hold back from God. We have NO EXCUSE not to serve Him. We can never say “I can’t do that because I’m not good at it” or “Im too afraid to do this” or “Someone else can do that better”. All he requires of us is a willing heart. He does the rest. So be bold! Step out and boast in your weaknesses so that God can shine through you. Step out and serve. It only takes a willing and selfless heart.

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

Geraldine

“The public humiliation was too much. The abuse was unbearable”. There were no tears as Geraldine remembered these things. Though her eyes were dry, they were filled with fear. Her face contorted to show her pain and her body stiffened as she recalled the terror of beatings. No, there were no tears. There was too much suffering, too much sorrow for tears.

For many years Geraldine faced a husband who was an angry alcoholic. She bore him 2 beautiful sons and persevered through a very difficult marriage. Geraldine bore the grunt of physical and emotional abuse day in and day out. She was frequently beaten causing injury and pain. She lived in fear of her husband, never knowing when he might snap again.

Geraldine started working for CMCT when she was only 15 years old. She attended an Anglo-Indian meeting near her home and some people recommended that she attended CMCT. She came to trust in God at this time and commenced work in the handicraft centre. At the age of 22, she was married. She had 2 sons and during her pregnancies she took time off from work with CMCT. Both her sons were sponsored through CMCT. She has now been with CMCT Handicraft Centre in the doll section for 9 years straight. 

About 1.5 years ago, Geraldine moved out of her husband’s home to live with her mother. Her mother had surgery and required care but Geraldine was also escaping for her own safety. Her husband continues to drink and is still aggressive and angry towards her.

One week ago now, her husband had a fall from height. He has a clot on the brain but refused to stay in hospital. He is at home relying on his sister to care for him. He has become more angry and uncontrollable and desperately needs medical assistance. Geraldine’s in-laws are trying to force her to move back in with him to care for him. She is under a lot of pressure. Though she wishes for him to be cared for, she also fears for her own safety.

“The best thing about CMCT is coming to chapel every day and learning about God”. Geraldine explains that she does not wish badly for her husband. She has never prayed for him to suffer. She only prays that God would change his heart and mind. Though she could be filled with hate for this man, and many would say she would be rightly angry, she is not. She only yearns for him to change.

Geraldine requests your prayers! Please pray that God will have his hand on this situation. Pray that He will protect Geraldine and bring healing to her husband. 

Refuge

20/08/14

Though this auto ride and walk have become somewhat routine for me, though this area is becoming familiar, it is never the same. Every time I walk the streets of Teynampet slums it seems different. There is a different vibe, or I meet a different person as I casual pass by, or there is a new devastating site to take in. Though it is constantly changing, I know there is one constant. There is one room that I can rely on to be there. This room has many functions and many flavours, but it remains with the same purpose. This room is a safe haven. A refuge for all. 

Tonight as I enter this haven of hope (otherwise used as a soup kitchen and tuition centre), I am bombarded by about 15 young and ferociously excited girls. It’s rally night. This week is girls rally week, they alternate with the boys. But tonight is the night these girls in Teynampet have been waiting for since exactly 2 weeks ago when the last rally was. Tonight these girls get to escape their normal little lives. They get to escape their lives of poverty, they can escape their drunkard fathers or depressed mothers or small, wet huts. They get to join with other girls all in similarly difficult circumstances. Together they get to forget. Together they get to focus on what really matters. Together they play and sing and dance. They learn new songs about God. They learn new skills with their hands like crafts and sewing. They hear a story about this amazing God who loves them and cares for them and is so powerful! PLUS they get a nice cooked evening meal – something many would otherwise be without!

Queueing up for an evening meal

Through this beautiful ministry many children have now come to put their faith in God. Tonight I had the pleasure of running the Teynampet Girls Rally lesson. It was such a fun night!! I spent a lot of time just playing with the girls. A few of them are studying in English medium so between my little Tamil and their little English we were able to communicate reasonably well. Where words failed miming became very effective!! We sang some beautiful songs, some in Tamil and some in English. Then I gave a little story. I was amazed at how gripped they were!! Like they were clinging to my every word for their very survival. We talked about fear, we learnt about the story of David and King Saul and we learnt about God as our Refuge and Strength.

Please be praying for this ministry! Pray for the children who attend. Many come from very difficult and heartbreaking backgrounds. Pray that they will find shelter and safety with God. Please pray for the social workers who are selflessly running these rallies!! They attend the rallies every night on alternate weeks and by the time they are finished their working day has been about 12 hours. Sometimes this is followed by an hour or more of travel to get home. They do not complain because they love to share the gospel with the children but please pray that God will sustain them in this!!

Hope

11/08/14

We walk down the dusty slum ally. It is about 4pm. Children are walking home from school, store fronts are busy, families sit idly on the ground with nothing else to do and many bikes carry people to their various afternoon working commitments. The day has been hot and the air is now thickening as the evening downpour of the rainy season threatens to begin. We are on our way to visit some soup kitchen beneficiary houses.

As we walk there are children calling out. Each street corner we turn there is another little school uniform calling out in excitement or a small, dirty hand tugging at our clothes. Asking ‘what time aunty? What time? When do we start?’ So much excitement. So much longing and hope in those beautiful young eyes. The answer was the same as it has been every day. ‘4:30! We start at 4:30!’

  

What time to we get to come inside that wonderful room? When do we get to sit together and study? When do we get to have the attention that we crave and receive the help that we need? When can we enter that room of hope? That room that makes us feel invincible and gives us a glimmer of the future? That room that gives us the boldness to dream and think about what we might become? When do we start?

The Street Children’s Ministry in the slum village of Teynampet offers free tuition to children each night. There are 3 CMCT staff workers providing this tuition. All these children come from devastating backgrounds. Some go to school and some do not. All are welcome for tuition. All receive a nutritious cooked evening meal where they would otherwise go hungry.

  

The children love to come. They are welcomed into this refuge where they can be safe and comfortable. Where they can learn and eat. Where they can be loved and cared for and nurtured in the ways that they need. They are so excited for the time and are very keen to learn. This ministry empowers them. It gives them pride and joy in their study and helps those at school to keep up. It gives them the confidence to hope. This also opens the door for the children to come to the yearly camps run by CMCT.

It is so wonderful to see the true appreciation and passion for study; to see education held so dearly and so valuable to children of all ages. Please be praying for the children in Teynampet slums. Pray that they will continue to learn about God through the Children’s ministry. Pray that God will continue to protect them in their difficult living environments, that he would provide their needs and continue to fill them with hope.

A Challenge in Selflessness

11/08/14

I slip my shoes off and crawl through the door. I feel the cold, damp concrete on my hands and knees and as I stand I feel the mud clinging to my skin. I stand, because there is nowhere to sit. I duck so the tiny fan on the roof doesn’t hit my head and so my head doesn’t put a hole through the aged and beaten thatched roof. I try to take a breath but my throat closes by instinct, my lungs refusing to breathe the thick air inside. I cough and focus, willing myself to breathe. My nose is punched by the smell of dust and mould and damp soil. At first, I see nothing. My eyes take a moment to adjust, it’s so dark. As my vision improves I see teeth, white. A smile. Then two eyes. One black and one blue. Beautiful. She greets me and tells me her name is Savithri. I smile back and greet her with my pitiful attempt at Tamil. I feel the stark contrast between my clean orange skirt and her ragged saree. I take a moment see the room. I realise most people could have the grand tour of this tiny home in 2 seconds but I want to see it. I want to really see it, feel it, smell it. I want to understand this lady. I do not want to disconnect or desensitise from the devastating reality of her life. I want to taste her pain and her suffering, I want it to eat deeply into me. This lady welcomes me into her home and her life; I will not take this lightly.

It’s about 3×4 metres, her home, made mostly of palms. The roof is riddled with thick dust and mould. There are visible holes in this old thatched roof where the rains have obviously been drizzling through onto the old, dirty matress where she sleeps. There are a few old toothbrushes poked into the holes in a feeble attempt to keep dry. There are a few silver plates and cups. And there is a photograph. It is framed. As I look closely I see the image of a beautiful young boy, obviously crippled. Underneath the image are dates. He is dead. He died last year.

I look at the lady. Though she smiles beautifully from her mouth, I can see her eyes. They tell her story. One black and one blue. Beautiful but deep. They tell of a lifetime of suffering. They tell of true sorrow and sadness. They show grief. Though she smiles with her mouth I can see her skin and face, weathered and beaten. Toughened in time through a hard life. Though she smiles with her mouth, I can see her frame, gaunt and ill. I can hear her cough and wheeze. This is Savithri. Through her smile, her words are sweet but I can feel the walls of this tiny home ache in pain. I can feel the weight of history in the space. This room whispers unsearchable suffering and helplessness.

Savithri was married young, she had a baby boy in 1991. He was disabled, so her husband left her. She was left with nothing. No money and no possessions except for this tiny home in Teynampet slums. The shoebox slum village built on a sewerage system. As her son was disabled he required full-time care. She could not work. For 22 years Savithri faithfully cared for her son. She fed him and cleaned him and loved him. She woke at night time to mop his urine and faeces from the bed. She nursed him when he was sick. She lived off a disabled pension of 1000 rupees monthly provided by the government (~$5 a week). This was all she had to support her son and herself. To eat, to get medical help, to pay rent and electricity bills, to buy warm clothing in winter or sheets for the old dirty mattress that they shared. Just $5 a week.

    

Late last year, after a long battle and many devoted years of fulltime care, this loving mother said goodbye to her beautiful son. He passed away at 22 from cancer. She was struck with grief. She also said goodbye to the disabled pension, leaving her with nothing. She is alone with nobody to care for her. She has no family. She has no money and no ability to earn money due to illness. With no training and being over 50 years of age no one will hire her.

Savithri

Savithri is a Teynampet soup kitchen beneficiary. The nutritious meal provided to her is the only meal she will eat each day. In the evening she manages to get a cup of tea. CMCT is currently looking to get her a new widowers pension to allow her an income. Through the CMCT soup kitchen ministry Savithri has come to know the Lord. She welcomes Jesus into her heart and her home. She finds comfort and peace through him. Though she has been neglected and afflicted in this world, she feels loved by God. Though she feels alone, she knows God is with her. Though she has nothing, she knows God will provide for her. She sits at the front of the soup kitchen meeting and loudly sings praises to God, she loves to hear his word and she memorizes the scriptures.

Today it was my pleasure to talk with Savithri in her home. It was my pleasure to pray for her. It was my pleasure because her passion and the strength of her faith were so inspiring. Her selflessness in the years caring for her son is exactly the kind of selflessness we are called to. Jesus came to serve. “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45). He calls us to serve. As many people here would do, Savithri could have abandoned her disabled son to go and seek a better life. Instead she accepted the task. She knuckled down and made the decision everyday to keep serving. Every morning she woke up she remade that decision to continue on in this selflessness. Every night, heavy from sleep, that she cleaned the bed after her son she chose to serve. She chose to serve in love. She sacrificed her own life, her own health, her everything to serve. I am challenged by that.

I hope Savithri never leaves my memory, I hope her little home never fades from my mind and the impact never lessens. Because this is reality and this perspective is far too valuable to lose. Too often are we distracted by the unimportant things in life. Too often do we worry over small and irrelevant issues. A little trouble with money… unpleasant work… too much work… an argument or friction with a friend… what clothing we might wear (out of our abundant wardrobes!)… maybe what our food tastes like…or what we look like. The list goes on forever. The list of worries and concerns about our own little lives that don’t really matter. I hope this perspective never leaves me.

When we live for Christ we are told we must die to self. That means all these worries and concerns are irrelevant. They should not occupy us or consume us. We are not here to serve ourselves. We are here to serve Christ. We are called to be selfless. “I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship” (Rom 12:1).

 I wonder if we could challenge ourselves to wake up everyday and make the decision again and again to be selfless. No matter what our immediate life throws in our face. I wonder if we can have the strength and perseverance to make the decision to serve.

“Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.” (Rom 12:9-13)

A couple of quick updates:

I got to catch up with Ayamal who I told you about a number of weeks ago. She has now had her cataract surgery, free through CMCT. She is doing well and her vision has been restored!! She is very thankful for your prayers. She still has some pain but this should ease as she recovers more.

Thankyou for your prayers for myself also, I am starting to recover though still have a fair bit of stomach pain! I am on a course of strong antibiotics and a few other medications that I hope will help me recover. I would very much appreciate your persistent prayer for my health. I am trusting God will care for me. 

With Love, Jo

Your Life is FLEETING. Don’t let it be FUTILE too.

07/08/2014

‘Tonight, I watched a terrified little girl get carried into theatre with tear-stained cheeks. I watched her scream as they placed the needle in her neck and then fall asleep as they injected the drugs through that needle. I watched the anaesthetist slide the tube down her throat and manually puff oxygen into her lungs. And as I watched the surgeon take a knife and start slicing through her scarred skin, the blood  rushing out and the occasional flicker of foot movement … I thought about it.’

Hello! I’m sorry it’s been a while since I have posted. I have had a lot of writing to do for the upcoming CMCT Showers Magazine that has resulted in many late nights! Better late than never though.

For the past few weeks I have primarily been in the Physiotherapy Department working and teaching the Physiotherapist Portia. It has been a good time. The business fluctuates a lot. I have found it very challenging to approach Physiotherapy here, as the understanding and management strategies are very different. We are progressing bit by bit! Portia is lovely and we have been having a great time working closely together in the little clinic .

On a few occasions I have had the opportunity to sit in theatre during surgery. I was the resident photographer for one of the surgeons! I really enjoyed this. Thankfully the site of blood and intestines doesn’t make me queasy…

CMCT’s Bethany Hospital is quite small. It takes on mostly simple surgeries and offers a number of specialties. The cost of services will vary depending on individual circumstance and many treatments are provided completely free of charge. This little hospital has a lovely operating theatre. They have a number of surgeons that volunteer their time to assist the patients here. I sat in on one general surgery (hernia mesh repair and lipoma excision on a middle aged man) and one plastic surgery (skin graft for burn wounds on a young girl).

Though I have sat in on surgeries before, I always get the same feelings. There is part of me that is ridiculously inquisitive and engulfed by the whole technical side. I am completely mesmerised and my brain ticks over all the theory and anatomy; from the anaesthetic drug cocktails to the nursing processes to the surgeon’s precise movements. I predict what needs to be done next, I quiz the surgeon on the process and discuss the various possibilities. I thrive on the intensity and excitement of it. But there are moments that I snap into a state of vulnerability. I sense an insatiable fear in the pit of my stomach to the point of crippling sickness. I suddenly become frozen. The surreal becomes real because I realise I am looking at a living, breathing human being whose very life is in the hands of these professionals: one whose life could so easily end right here with one small error in judgement. I realise that the skin, the muscle and tissue and blood and bone and organs…they allow us to live. Our human body. Our very vulnerable human body.

I wonder if we often take the time to think about this. Tonight, I watched a terrified little girl get carried into theatre with tear-stained cheeks. I watched her scream as they placed the needle in her neck and then fall asleep as they injected the drugs through that needle. I watched the anaesthetist slide the tube down her throat and manually puff oxygen into her lungs. And as I watched the surgeon take a knife and start slicing through her scarred skin, the blood  rushing out and the occasional flicker of foot movement … I thought about it.

It was a long surgery and photos were only required at sparse intervals so I had a lot of time. And the thinking distracted me from the aching in my legs and feet from standing for so long!

Our life is fleeting. Our human bodies are weak and vulnerable. We have no idea how long our life might be. In Ps144:4 we are reminded that “Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow”.

You have no guarantee what might happen with your life. James 4:14 says “yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes”. Like a mist, your life may come and pass. In the context of eternity what does this mean? Your life is like the morning mist that disappears after but a little time, and leaves no sign that it ever existed. You don’t know what tomorrow will hold, how long your life will be, what might happen; will you be happy or sad, will you have enough money, will you be well or sick, will you be valued and loved?

1Peter 1:24 says “All flesh is like grass and all its glory like the flower of the grass. The grass withers, and the flower falls”. Your life is short. We care for our physical bodies with food to survive; we try to stay healthy, take the medicines we need, eat the food we ought, but for what purpose? The Bible says our flesh is like the grass that will wither. What are we focusing on? If we are focusing only on this weak and vulnerable body of ours; if we seek only to nourish our physical body what is the purpose? If we seek to succeed and build riches, what is the purpose? Solomon, the man of wisdom, calls it vanity. We do not even know how long our life will be. The Bible says that the glories of life are like flowers. Striving for nice things in this life like public status, money, comfort, health … these things are like the flowers. They will fade. They will not last. Nothing from this world lasts forever. Which makes these things pointless in the end.

I think it is not until we are faced front on, full force, with the vulnerability of our physical form, like when we face the death of a loved one or our own terminal illness,  and we see the reality of this vulnerability, that we can realise the temporary, futile nature of a worldly life. It’s ironic because it’s probably the most important fact that should shape how we live life but instead we only think about it when facing death. A worldly life with only worldly ‘food’ is empty of meaning and can never properly satisfy. There will always be hunger.

So what do we do? What is the purpose? With such a fleeting life what should we be seeking? What should we be eating?

In a world where nothing lasts we need something to cling to. God gives that to us. Though the grass withers and the flower fades we are told that the WORD OF THE LORD STAND FOREVER. This is something to lean on, to cling to. If there is something for us to seek, it should be the Word of the Lord.

In the Bible Jesus tells us that He is the bread of life. In John 6:35 it says “Jesus said to them ‘ I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.” Jesus is saying that he is the real food we need. He is the spiritual food that can give us eternal life. He is the food that will nourish us, satisfy us, strengthen us, and sustain us through everything in this earthly life and into eternity. He is even the food that will give us deep joy. Jesus is telling us that HE IS ESSENTIAL FOR LIFE.

In Matt 5:6 Jesus says “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied”. Jesus is saying that those who come to him seeking to be made righteous in the sight of God will be satisfied! Those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, they will be satisfied.

When we accept Jesus as our Lord and as our Saviour, He becomes the ‘bread’ … the nourisher of our life, both now and forever.  He sustains and feeds us, he strengthens us, he satisfies us. Not only do we receive the gift of eternal life, but God fills us with his Holy Spirit which gives power. God lavishes us with promises for this life also! When we trust in Him he promises to be with us always, to hold us and care for us, to listen to us and to answer our prayers. To provide for us. God is good, he cares for you and when you trust in Him he is with you where ever you go. With God, life takes on deep meaning and purpose. With God we have true satisfaction. With God we do not need to distract ourselves from the uncomfortable thought of vulnerability and death. With God we can have complete confidence in life and in death.

So, since I’ve been thinking about it, I thought  I’d leave you today with a few questions … What ‘food’ are you seeking in your life? What are your priorities? Where are you looking for satisfaction? Are you seeking the perishable food and the vain tinsel of this life … those things that will perish, that are not satisfying? Or are you seeking  for The Bread of Life which is Jesus Christ? Are you taking His offer of salvation that you might be seen by God as righteous? Are you turning away from the sinfulness of this world and allowing  Jesus to be your Lord and Saviour? Are you allowing God into your life as He desires, to fill you with true joy and peace and confidence? Are you acknowledging His daily care and provision for you? He longs to share in your life and give it purpose, fullness and joy.

What food are you seeking??
The grass withers, the flower fades but the Word of the Lord stands forever.

Just before I let you go I’d love to request some prayer! I have been a little unwell this week with an abdominal problem. I have seen a doctor and am waiting for a decision regarding management. Please pray that God would heal me so that I am not impeded from continuing the work here in India. Thank you!

Flower Making

I continue to meet regularly with the ladies from The Rainbow Ministry. They and many of their husbands and children are HIV affected. They are all so beautiful. The exude joy with faces beaming with smiles and laughter. They are so welcoming to me and so hungry for the Word. We have been working through the topic of prayer. It is so encouraging to watch these ladies grow in their faith and learn to depend on the Lord in prayer. They are all confidently coming before the Lord in prayer now and learning more and more scripture for memory. 

They have also been teaching me how to make these beautiful flowers!! I feel rather uncoordinated and they laughed at me a little but I successfully made one! In about 10 times the time it would take them…

“The grass withers and the flower fades but the word of the Lord stands forever”